If only......

This morning as i woke up at 05h30 (Gauteng) to get ready for my trip back to KZN i started realizing that most of us on earth live our live's and constantly saying "what if". This happens frequently to more and more people everyday. For example: I started my writing QUE'S THOUGHTS just last night. I started by having more that one glasses of wine and my mind was impaired. There are so many spelling error's in my first post, i have lost count. It is often said that FIRST IMPRESSIONS LASTS. So i said to myself, after a friend of mine blatantly pointed out my spelling errors, IF ONLY i had published my first post on my sober senses- maybe no spelling errors would have occurred.

Last night i stayed up till 00h36, but did set the alarm for 05h30 so i could be early. But all my things had been packed and all i needed to do was to shower, brush my teeth, have cereal, get dressed, and leave at 07h15. When the alarm went-off, i realized that i had only slept for 5 hours. I needed an extra hour of sleep, so i could manage to stay awake in the bus back home. Again i said to myself IF ONLY i had set the alarm for 06h30. Because i honestly did not need an hour and forty five minutes to do all i did this morning. Come to think of it, it only took me about 35 minutes to prepare. I could not turn back the hands of time and undo things. I'm the kind of person that will not sleep after the alarm goes off. So i was ready very early, and damn, it was very cold when i waited for the driver to pick me up. I waited in the house, but we all know the Gauteng weather. Thank goodness i had this blog to write in and pass the time.

So when I'm in the bus back home today, i know i will be very sleepy. I will be so lucky if i end up not saying IF ONLY i didn't drink so much wine i would have gone to bed early and got enough rest. IF ONLY i had given myself an extra hour to sleep, maybe it would have made a difference. But i know that "IF ONLY" will not help me stay awake. Instead, it will make me keep blaming myself. So i have come to realize that what's done is done. As human beings we need to try and live our lives without any WHAT IF's. We should learn to accept any fault that occurs (whether it was intentional or not) because blaming ourselves will not change anything. We should try again and again to do write by ourselves. If you don't succeed the first time, try again. If i have a long trip to take the following day, i should know that i mustn't drink so much. I hope to stick by this. There is a Zulu saying "Akulahlwa mbeleko ngokufelwa", which means "don't give up because you failed on your first attempt". From now on- i hope to live my life without having any WHAT IF's.